Thursday, September 25, 2008

Things to Do on a Date That Are Cheap

The most exciting, romantic, fun and memorable dates do not have to be expensive. If you have either no budget or a small budget the key is to be creative and thoughtful. In the short paragraphs that follow you will learn the best things to do on a date that are cheap. You will also discover that free and cheap dates can be infinitely better than the most expensive dating experiences; we have all heard the saying, money does not bring happiness.

Go On A Picnic

You an go any where on a picnic. If you live in the city, find a park or even a roof! If you life in the country find somewhere exciting or romantic. Think out of the box. You could have a picnic at night under the stars or at dawn, watching the sun come up.

Watch Planes Take Off And Land

This is an exciting and free dating experience. Park your car as close to the runways as is possible. Get out of your car and site with your date on a blanket placed on the roof of your car. This is an exciting experience they will never forget.

Watch A Classic Movie At The Theater
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Everyone takes their date to the movies. It is one of those huge cliches. Be different. Take your date to a classic movie. This is a cheap date and can be a fantastic experience.

Go Swimming At An Expensive Hotel

Walk into an expensive hotel and use their swimming pool. You will be surprised. Most expensive hotels would not think twice of someone walking in and going swimming. Since they are so big, usually, they would not know you from their actual guests. This can be an exhilarating and fun dating experience and, of course, it is free.

Help The Community

You could spend the day helping the community in some way. One idea is to volunteer for the day at a homeless shelter. You could also pitch in at an old people's home. This is a free date and will reward you with lasting memories. It will also tell you a lot about the character of your date.

Visit A Local Landmark

You can find a list of all the local landmarks in your area by doing a brief search on Google. You might be surprised at just what is on offer. It will certainly make for a memorable date and will, perhaps, make you feel closer to the community in which you live.

Take A Ghost Walk

Many Towns and cities have late-night tours for people who want to spot ghosts. It usually involves a small group of excited individuals. At the end of your walk you usually go for drinks or a meal and discuss the recent activities.

Travel To Another Country, State, County or Province

This can be an exciting, somewhat eccentric date. You could spend the day in new places, for instance, or take a trip out of the city to a quaint town totally unlike your own town or city. Buy t-shirts to remember the experience whenever you wear them.

Go Fishing

If you already have finishing tackle, excellent. If not you can borrow it from a friend. If your date is new to fishing it can be a hugely memorable experience when you catch your first fish! Remember to take a camera to record the moments forever.

Build A Tree House

When you get older, you often forget the fun times you had as a child. It can be equally fun to re-visit your childhood. Building a tree house might take many days but each one will be exciting and fun. When you finishing building the tree house you are also left with a special place to visit and call your own.

Going on a date need not be expensive. What you must do is think out of the box. The best things to do on a date that are cheap can often cost you nothing at all and, yet, be hugely memorable experiences. When coming up with your own ideas, always keep your date in mind, and try to appeal to them as individuals. If they have always wanted to stargaze, taken them stargazing. Maybe they cannot remember much about their birth-town; take them there on a date! If you tailor your dates to suit your partner, the possibilities for a cheap date are endless and always fun.

Monday, September 8, 2008

8 LESSONS IN LOVE.

If you feel like it's time to reconnect with him, here's how to go about it...

Follow these eight steps to reconnecting with your partner, only moving on to the next step when your partner's ready. Take your time, as some of them may be difficult – honesty is often brutal.

The key is to have these discussions in a non-threatening, non-accusatory way. And if your partner refuses top discuss any of these issues, it may be time to reconsider his commitment to you.

1. Start talking to your partner again, making it clear what the benefits are if you reconnect. Get him to sit down with and listen.

2. Read up on relationship dynamics and share your knowledge with your partner. Don't be self- righteous or condescending. Also, don't hold yourself up as a relationship expert. Simply bring up any issues you've found interesting and ask for his opinion.

3. Work on your own self- esteem. If you feel better about yourself, you're much more likely to feel better about your partner.

4. When discussing relationship issues, focus on yourself – never accuse your partner. Rather approach things in a non-threatening way that encourages open discussion.

5. Talk about your relationship goals together, you shared very happy times- recall those and look at ways to return to that state of affairs.

6. Discuss what each of your needs are. Remember, the relationship will not be successful if the needs of both parties aren't met.

7. Talk about ways to meet needs that aren't being met at present – you might be surprised at what he feels is lacking in your relationship.

8. Commit to meeting each other's needs and continuing in a spirit of openness and honesty.



BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

More than words

What makes you feel most loved by your partner? What do you desire above all else? If nothing springs to mind immediately, try thinking about the negative use of love language, such as what your partner does (or doesn't do) that hurts you deeply. If, for example, your deepest pain comes from his criticism, your love language is probably Words of Affirmation.

What have you tended to ask of your partner? Whatever it is, is likely to be in keeping with your primary love language. For example, have you often verbalised your desire to spend more time with your partner or perhaps go away together at weekends? Then Quality Time is likely to be your primary love language.

Words of affirmation
Words of Affirmation are more than compliments – they are a way of communicating your thanks and appreciation for the 'little' things that your partner does for you. An affirmation person will be more willing to compromise, for example, if you show your appreciation for who they are and what they bring into your life. If you are the one in need of Words of Affirmation, tell your partner that you don't need affirmation because you don't trust or believe in his love, but because you are in need of reassurance as it makes you feel safe and secure. Compliments and positive input will also work better for you than criticism.

Quality time
If it's Quality Time that does it for you or your partner, it is important that you both know that it has nothing to do with proximity – watching TV together doesn't cut it. During this time you should give each other your undivided attention. According to Chapman, by giving your partner 20 minutes of your undivided attention, you are giving each other 20 minutes of life. You will never have that time again; you are essentially giving your lives to each other and this is a powerful communicator of love.

One man Chapman counselled said his wife had left him after 17 years of marriage and he couldn't understand why. She'd come home every evening and without fail would complain about her job. He dealt with this by giving her advice on how to deal with the situation. When she didn't take it, he got angry and told her he was no longer interested in discussing it with her and would leave the room whenever she brought it up. He assumed she wanted help, when all she wanted was for him to make the time to listen to her.

Receiving gifts
There's nothing quite like receiving a gift and it's hard to imagine anyone not feeling loved when they get one. It's something you can hold in your hand, knowing your partner was thinking of you. The gift itself is a symbol of that thought and is therefore very precious – whether it costs money or not. Gifts are visual symbols of love and are more important to some than to others. If Receiving Gifts is your primary love language you will be greatly moved by gifts, as you will see these as confirmation of your partner's love for you.

Obviously if they are not forthcoming, you may question that love. On the other hand, if your partner's primary love language is Receiving Gifts, and yours isn't, you will have to learn what Chapman calls your 'second language' and learn to become a present giver. Make a list of all the gifts your partner has expressed excitement about in the past and select ones you are comfortable with (they don't have to cost anything). Don't wait for a special occasion – almost any gift you give him will be seen as an expression of your love for him.


BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN

EARNING MORE THAN HIM.

Some men find it impossible to swap these roles,"says HARRISON"especially men who are stuck in traditional attitudes, who believe that a man's role is to make money and a woman’s role is to make babies and stay at home.

"For these men, the size of their home, the type of car they drive and the schools their children attend represent their success. A man like this will almost definitely experience conflict when 'traditional' gender roles are turned upside down and his wife or girlfriend actually earns more than him."

"A man who can't make the gender shift often feels like he has failed in the traditional role as provider, "This leads to low self-esteem, which, in turn, causes him to lash out at his partner."

Such a man accuses his wife of having affairs with a colleague; he questions every function she has to attend and is suspicious if she has to work late. Some men start accusing their wives of everything from frigidity to promiscuity.

"A successful woman who is involved with a man with low self-esteem, who can't handle her financial success, can get very depressed by the belittling accusations that her partner makes,

If you earn more than him and it causing tension, try these practical steps:

Don't shut him out
In these trying situations, successful women are often forced to adopt a very businesslike approach. "This may be necessary to ensure their success in their careers but it does little for their personal relationships.

"They develop an ability to "shut off" and refuse to discuss the situation. Her partner, who already feels emotionally uncomfortable, then experiences a further emotional blow from his wife’s distant attitude."

Making the relationship work
"Money is often the excuse for a couple to argue," says Cecile, "when in fact there may be underlying issues. Times have changed and women don't need to apologise for earning more but they must also be sensitive when they deal with their partner who may have a fragile ego.

"Men need to see the fact that their partner is doing well as a positive thing and not as a threat to their masculinity. Couples need to celebrate each other's strengths and successes."

Communication is vital
A couple must discuss the problems. The man has to have an outlet for his feelings and the woman should understand that she needs to be sensitive in not making him feel useless and inadequate.

"Men are very touchy in the arena of earnings," IF his partner earnings are more than he,s. this can really undermine him. It takes a lot of maturity from a man to handle this situation.

Be aware
If a woman is earning more, she must be hyper-aware of her partner and his needs. The most effective way of dealing with this situation is for the man not to see earning capacity as a reflection or direct sign of his potency. Go out of your way to make him feel potent and never ever throw it at him that you earn or pay for more. This is a sure way to make the man feel inadequate.

Be honest
Start with an open and honest discussion. This must take place without any accusations of 'you do this' or 'you do that'. Rather use the 'I' message.

Instead of saying, "You are aggressive", say, 'I experience you as being aggressive". Then it is not an attack but a subjective experience.

Just listen
Listen to what your partner is saying. The imago-technique can be used very successfully in such circumstances.

The imago-technique requires that person A is allowed to talk without person B interrupting; person B only listens. Person B must then summarise what he heard from A. A then answers and says whether what B heard is what A actually meant.

The process is then repeated and B talks while A listens. In this way they are prevented from yelling at each other and both parties learn to really talk to each other.

Put yourself in your partner's shoes
When you are wearing his/her shoes, you discover how to look at a situation through his/her eyes and to observe the situation as he/she sees it.

BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN

FOR THE LOVE OF SEX

At times it's incredibly seductive to make sensual love with the lights dimmed and flickering candles casting mysterious images on the walls. But there are other times when you just want each other so much that making love becomes wildly animalistic.

It's perfectly normal for one couple to have both kinds of sex at any given time in their relationship.

It's about love-making
So what's the difference between sex and making love? Like a good rule of thumb, this one's simple: if it's about connecting with each other, then it's about lovemaking. Look at the words "making love" – they're about creating something, building something, increasing intimacy. Lovemaking takes your relationship to a higher realm.

A close friend of mine received a terrible shock when her husband came home and told her he'd been retrenched. His failure hung heavily on him. Instead of her reassuring him with endless platitudes, they made gentle love – with him on top, while she caressed his body. Sometimes bodies talk more clearly to each other than the crispest sentences. Months later, when he'd found other work, he told her how meaningful their lovemaking had been that day – it was as though his manhood had been reaffirmed at the deepest level.

Because we are physical beings, on many occasions we find that there's a time for good old-fashioned love-making, and a place for "if it ain't kinky, it ain't sex". But if you have a secure, intimate relationship, and you've truly made love before, it's easy to know the difference, and thoroughly enjoy both kinds of sex.

BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN

CONVERSATION KILLERS

When out on a date, truly fabulous girls don't talk about themselves all the time. They ask a man open-ended questions and act as though whatever he says is fascinating. And until they know him really well, they avoid the following topics like the plague:

Health problems
Neither your ovarian cysts nor your Uncle's colon surgery will contribute much towards setting a romantic mood. And, for heaven's sake save your periods/acne/dandruff stories for your girlfriends. Guys really don't want to know.

Ex-boyfriends
Avoid any mention of exes at all. Talking too much about a past relationship will only reveal your flaws. He doesn't need to know your last boyfriend was a loser. There's no need tether yourself to the past. If he knows all your dating foibles, he's more likely to lose interest.

Daily grind
Face facts – most of what you did today wasn't very exciting – at least, not to a man you don't know very well yet. Domestic mishaps, you nephew's antics, the squabble at the office and your addiction to Isidingo will inspire more yawns than and sleeping pills.

BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

BREAK IT OFF

While you are in a relationship, you are out of circulation. So you are stopping yourself from finding a happier relationship with someone you are better suited to.

Susan Page, author of If I'm so wonderful why am I still single, says that another important reason to get out of an unhealthy relationship is that staying in one could be detrimental to your self-esteem. Even though self-esteem is largely about feelings you have about yourself, they still need to be reinforced by positive messages from outside.

If your partner doesn't appreciate or love you for who you are, you risk starting to see yourself as they see you. Staying in a relationship in which you spend a lot of time with a person who doesn't value you and turns your positive qualities into negative ones will severely harm your self-esteem.

Does your partner tell you that your natural need for intimacy shows you are being clingy? Does he say that your outgoing personality is irritating and attention-seeking? Does he say your sensitivity is over-dramatic and crazy? It is imperative to get out of any relationship that reinforces your weaknesses rather than your strengths.

If you answered yes to any of these questions then it's time to break it off. It won't be easy but Susan Page suggests the following four strategies for ending things:

1. Try to say something positive before or after you end the relationship. Bad news is easier to digest if it comes with a genuine compliment.

2. Remember that you are not responsible for giving a reason for saying no to the relationship. You can be polite and respectful, but you don't have to give a lengthy explanation for your decision.

3. Don't offer false hope. Be clear that this is the end.

4. Remember, you are not responsible for the other person's reaction to your saying no. As long as you are kind, you cannot control how the person is going to react.

If you're still having second thoughts about breaking it off, be honest and ask yourself if you are getting what you really want and deserve out of the relationship. And if you've asked for it before but it just doesn't seem to happen, you know what needs to be done.


by HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

GET OVER HIM

The following tactics could ease the pain when recovering from a broken heart:

  • Give yourself time to grieve over the relationship, but make a conscious effort not to let it take over your life.

  • Don't sit poring over pictures, CDs and souvenirs of the relationship. Put them away in a suitcase and replace them with new objects that hold no associations.

  • Make a point of going out to new places (not the ones you used to go to with him) and accept invitations to parties, events and functions. The sooner you expose yourself to new relationships, the sooner you'll find one.

  • Surround yourself with positive energy and treat yourself to a new hair-do, wardrobe and beauty routine. Knowing you look your best can go a long way to reviving morale.

  • Don't become bitter and boring by replaying your lost relationship over and over again to your mother/sister/ girlfriends. The milk is spilt, so it's time to stop crying. Somewhere out there is a brand-new, exciting lover who'll make that happy ending come true for you.

  • Take up a new hobby or enrol in a course that will keep your mind occupied.

  • Make sure you get enough sleep, exercise regularly and eat properly so your health doesn't suffer while you're trying to get over the relationship.

  • If you bump into your ex or someone mentions he's involved with another woman, behave like a lady. Don't start swearing, weeping or spouting vicious intimate details about his behaviour with you. Your dignity, bearing and self-control are your best allies.

  • If you're not ready to date again, don't force yourself to. Whatever you do, don't jeopardise a new relationship by comparing a man with your ex, or regaling him with the sad story of your lost love. He's not there for that.

  • If you really can't cope emotionally, don't be afraid to ask for help – see a therapist.

  • by HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

    The Amazing Benefits of a Female Led Relationship

    Have you heard any of these jokes:

    A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds: 'Husband Wanted'. Next day she received a hundred letters.

    They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'

    If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you
    say -- talk in your sleep.

    First guy says, 'My wife's an angel!' Second guy remarks, 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'

    And then the young son asked his father, 'Is it true that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?' Dad replied, 'That happens in every country, son.'

    Why is the beginning of the relationship so exciting, romantic, hot and after a few years of marriage the happy couple is contemplating divorce?

    The problem with relationships is that men and women have different needs - everyone knows that but when you understand what a women wants and what a man wants and then work on the relationship with an understanding of each others needs you can develop the relationship into an exciting, loving, caring satisfying marriage.

    How can this be accomplished?

    Women want attention, appreciation, and communication.

    Men want sex. The sex drive in a man is incredibly strong. Think about the beginning of most relationships. The man is attentive, appreciative and talks. The women gets what she wants because the man is interested in getting her into bed.

    So a great way for couples to bring excitement back into the relationship is to have the women focus on channeling her husbands sex drive. Once this is accomplished she will get what she wants. When a man's sex drive is channeled he will again become attentive, romantic, appreciative and he will communicate.

    This can be done with a little imagination. It wont require the wife to hang from the ceiling fan dressed in garter belts with a paddle in her hand. When a wife learns to use her feminine qualities she can bring her husband to attention in a very short period of time.

    Sound like work? Sound a little weird? Every relationship requires work. If you want a relationship that you've only dreamed about learn how to use your sexuality and you'll find your husband begging to do things for you.



    by HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN

    Friday, September 5, 2008

    The Number One Remedy For a Broken Heart

    If there was just one remedy for a broken heart what would it be? Could there be one and only one perfect remedy for a broken heart that would fit all broken relationships and people? Probably not. So when you consider the multiple possibilities that are available to you to heal the pain of a broken heart there is one thing, one avenue that will outshine the rest.

    Give of yourself. What does this mean? It simply means to give yourself, your time, your experience, your knowledge, your expertise to others. Give yourself to a cause, a friend, a charity. Give to someone or something in need. Make yourself available to others. When you give of yourself in this nature you will get something back. It may be something tangible or it may be a sense of fulfillment. It may be simply the feeling that you have done some good and that there is a bigger picture out there above and beyond the heartache that you are feeling.

    If you have experienced a break up from a relationship then you know that feeling of heart ache. You understand that you will feel pain from the loss of the relationship. You will have to go through it and deal with it. It is real. If someone hit you with a brick you wouldn't question the pain, would you? You couldn't prevent the pain. You would feel it until it stopped. The same holds true with a "broken heart." Accept that you will hurt but realize that the pain will stop someday.

    To give of yourself you need to embrace the fact that you can feel so deeply and that you have a gift to share. Share your gift with others on a daily basis. Each time you do this and affect someone on a personal level the pain of your own heartache will begin to fade. By easing the pain of others you will begin to ease your own pain.

    Find what makes you strong and use this to help others. This is the number one remedy for a broken heart. Give of yourself and the rewards you get in return will far outweigh the pain of a broken heart.

    by HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN

    Thursday, September 4, 2008

    Should Women Settle

    Many women wind up with someone who they never thought they would be with because they got tired of waiting on that one person who can offer them everything they want and then some. They hear that their standards are too high, they are getting old, or what they are looking for isn't realistic. They take all of that into consideration and find themselves unhappy and trying to turn the person who they are with into someone they are not, which brings us to that infamous question... should women settle?

    Should women settle has always been and will always be an ongoing debate. In an article titled "Marry Him!" written by Lori Gottlieb, she stated, "settling will probably make you happier in the long run." I was totally taken by her comment and she has a right to her opinion, but the answer is no! You should not settle, but you do compromise. To clarify the difference, settling is settling for less; accepting false comfort, and compromise is coming to a "mutual" agreement and finding balance. "Many people look for someone to complete their life rather than compliment it" (Sacco, 2007)! By settling, you are giving yourself away at a discount to someone who will never truly fulfill your needs and make you complete.

    You start on your settling quest when many people tell you that your wants are unrealistic. After processing those comments over and over, you slowly begin to agree because you can't seem to find a man who can provide you with your wants. Once you do that, you just started to lower your standards and became more open to accepting someone whom you wouldn't normally accept.

    When you meet someone, you will not always know if this person is good for you because you will be too busy caught up in the adrenaline rush that you are blinded by reality. The longer the rush, the more you will be willing to accept things that you don't like. Once the rush is over, you start to see things that were hidden by the rush. Since most of you lead with emotions, you are now emotionally attached to someone who you know that you are not compatible with. And the longer you wait to get out of this relationship, the more you are willing to settle.

    Accept the fact that you will have failed relationships; that is a way of life. However, I do understand that you will grow tiresome of relationship after relationship. You will often times become confused and start to wonder if something is wrong with you, but to further explain this, look up the article, "99 Percent of All Relationships Will Fail." When this happens, don't get discouraged and cling on to the next relationship that comes your way. You will be doing yourself a major injustice and find yourself settling again. If you know what you want, don't will it to happen, wait for it happen.

    Finding someone who completes you requires patience. It may take longer for you than others, but don't get discouraged. If you get impatient, you will find yourself in a situation that you will probably regret. Don't get wrapped around your age and your beauty. Women are like fine wine... they get better with age.

    "Many are in love with the idea of being "in love" and this is why they settle for less than ideal mates" (Sacco, 2007). You must realize while on your quest to meet the man who gives you everything you want and completes you, by no means will he be perfect. He is going to do things that will irritate you or have completely different views than you, but that doesn't mean he won't complete you. You may have so much in common, yet you two are very different. However, this doesn't mean you don't try. You still don't settle... but you do compromise. After you compromise and accept the things that you cannot change, he maybe just the person who completes you.

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN


    How to Find a Man Looking For Marriage - Advice For Single Women

    Many single women would really love just one thing. That's to find an honest, sincere and fun natured man to establish a long term relationship with. It can be a struggle to meet a man who is also looking for a commitment. Naturally you can't bring up the subject of marriage during the first couple of dates you have with a man, so how do you spot a man looking for marriage? There are actually some telltale signs that women should be aware of. These signs indicate that the man in question is open for a substantial and meaningful relationship.

    One noticeable trait that a man looking for marriage is likely to have is that he's bored or disinterested in playing the field. He doesn't hang out at bars, he's not dating a different woman every night of the week, and he's not portraying himself as single and available. Generally a man who is more focused on work and spends his evenings in watching television or enjoying the company of friends, is ready to settle down. If a man spends every night out drinking and partying, he's no where near the marriage altar in terms of his frame of mind.

    When you are trying to find a man looking for marriage take note of how he reacts around children. If a man is entering the phase in his life where a wife and children are appealing, he'll be warm and welcoming with children. He'll try and engage them and will actually want to spend time with his friends who have kids. He's not frightened by kids and he may even mention in passing how he's looking forward to being a dad one day.

    Men who are entrenched in their careers and enjoy the idea of saving for their future may be considering marriage. Many men who are still playing the field will have no concern about their finances. They generally aren't thinking about mortgages or savings accounts. If you want to find a man looking for marriage, pay special attention to the ones who talk about their future goals and are working towards them.

    Knowing what to look for in a man will help you determine whether the potential for marriage is there. If you feel the time has come for you to buy the dress and take that walk down the aisle, finding a man who is at that same stage in his own life is vitally important. For more signs of men ready to marry as well as signs of men who have no desire to become a husband soon.

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

    The Right Way of Talking to Him About Commitment

    It's typical for a woman these days to go through the frustrating - and downright baffling - experience of watching their current boyfriend drift away right after she fessed up her feelings for him. I mean, how can being downright honest ruin a good friendship?

    Being honest is a very admirable quality in a relationship, and many of the better men out there actually like seeing the women they go out with to be upfront about stuff. But when you lay out all your cards all of a sudden and try to convince him to go into a deeper relationship with you, it's guaranteed to be a recipe for failure and heartbreak.

    Here's why. Whether you know it or not, the great guys out there have likely had their share of flings and girlfriends, and are therefore likely to have a few brushes with the weird, fussy, "clingy" types of women. While jocks might like the idea of their women clinging to them in the scene, you wouldn't exactly like the idea of dating a jock, right?

    The good men know that the "clingy" types of women are the same "needy" types that rush into relationships. While you may not mean to come off as clingy or needy, trying to push the relationship into the next level sets off an alarm in the minds of these men - and guess what label they'll put on you then and there.

    On the other hand, it's not a good idea to just clam up and keep your peace, either. If you talk very little about yourself and how you feel about things, then he might start seeing you as aloof, or - worse - weird. While it doesn't get them running away from you like being clingy does, it does get the wheels turning.

    So what's the right way of talking to him about commitment?

    First of all, you'll have to never forget that you can't - read, can't - convince a man to love you, much less to get into a deeper, longer-term relationship with you. Merely trying can ruin your chances for good.

    Secondly, remember that the good men out there know what they want. And it's absurdly simple in most cases - they'd like to be with women who make their lives easier and more enjoyable. They'd like women who are independent, fun to be with, and "cool." Simply being what these good men are looking for is enough to attract them to you. In fact, when they like you so much, they might even move the relationship forward for you. Wouldn't that be great?

    In a nutshell, learn to listen to him. Acknowledge his way of thinking and looking at things. Once you get to see things in his context, you'll be better able to relate to him and realize the things that make him tick. Naturally, this doesn't always work, as some of these men will ultimately be incompatible with your way of thinking, feeling, and acting. But give yourself a chance to be one of the "cool women" out there!

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN

    Attract a Man Who Will Be Committed, Not Faithful

    The Institute of Marriage is not to be entered into lightly. A marriage is about longevity, not about a weekend fling. It should not be entered into with thoughts of, "oh, if it doesn't work out, we can always get a divorce". It is an institution of love, commitment, respect and understanding. This means that excess emotional baggage, which includes childhood issues, past relationship issues and adult insecurities should be worked through before taking that final leap into a committed marriage.

    I had a discussion with a single lady and she said, 'As a single woman, there has not been one single moment with a guy that I have not been asked, "So, why are you still single"? My answer, "Because I choose to be". The reply always throws them off guard, because they are waiting to hear a response along the lines of, "I haven't found Mr. Right", or "All good men are either married or gay". But these men are never prepared to hear that a woman is single because she chooses to be. We live in an era where Sex and the City reigns and the plight of the single woman seeking Mr. Big, I mean, Mr. Right is analyzed to bits. While I will be the first to admit that the show is one of my guilty pleasures, it does portray single women in a negative light. Why can't women be successful and chose to be single at the same time without being in a rush to get married and have a bunch of babies? As popular as the show was, it failed to portray women as being happily single. Samantha was the closest. Of course, this is the kind of woman that most men will not marry. Why? She is not wife material. Instead, they want the woman who is anxious or maybe desperate to get married and have babies. That is an insecure man.

    Unfortunately, these women are the ones that will often fall into the statistics of having been cheated on by their husbands. They were so driven to get married and start a family that they did not take the time to really get to know their partners. As a result, important emotional issues were over-looked. Some of these men were taught that it's ok to have a wife at home while having a few women on the side and as long the wife doesn't find out, then it's ok. Maybe they witnessed their father cheating on their mother in the same manner and they grew up thinking that if Dad did it then it must be ok. A lot of times these men grow up being disgusted by their father's behaviour, but felt powerless to do anything about it.

    Having a committed partner is more desirable than a partner who will be faithful, because, women if your partner is committed to you, he will also be faithful. But how do you ensure that he will be committed? You will know this through honest and direct communication. Ask the hard questions, do not leave any stone unturned. This is going to be your life long partner, you need to know every thing there is to know. There should only be inconsequential surprises during the actual marriage. Work through your emotional baggage before you enter into a relationship. That way you will be more receptive to red flags that signal a deeper emotional issue. This is not to say that you won't have emotional issues, but the issues should be the ones that can only be worked through while you are in a relationship because that is the only place where you will realize that you do have some left-over, unresolved issues.

    Many women and men are afraid of being alone. Yet, this is very important if we want to choose a proper mate. Get to know yourself first. If you do not spend some time alone with yourself, then how will you know who you are? How will you know your likes and dislikes? Furthermore, how are you going to try and get to know someone else if you do not know yourself, much less marry that person? That is a recipe for infidelity, because the relationship was not based on a solid foundation.

    Women, fall in love with yourself first before falling in love with someone else. Be committed to your personal growth and your personal welfare. Spend some quality time with yourself. Take yourself out on a date, travel to some exotic location by yourself or just simply stay home and be comfortable doing so. By working on your relationship with yourself, you can then begin to work on a relationship with someone else, who has personal integrity, respect for himself and respect for you. When you are committed to your life, you develop an inherent respect for yourself, an independence that will prove to be a strong elixir not for Mr. Right, but for your perfect lifetime partner. And because of your commitment to yourself, not only is he committed to himself, he will step into your life and be committed to you and only you.

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

    Common Sense Ways to Save a Relationship From a Break Up

    Recently at a JUST FOR SINGLES seminar, the following commonsense ways to save a relationship from a break up was shared with single men and women in attendance. For those of you who were not opportune to attend, we will highlight here some of the commonsense ways to save any relationship from a break up before and after marriage.

    BE PROUD OF YOUR LOOKS
    Single men and women seeking to keep a long term relationship that will eventually lead to marriage should be proud of their looks. Never consider your size as an obstacle to finding the wife or husband of your dream. Whether fat, slim, short, tall, dark or white, there is someone out there, who God has made just for you. He or she will appreciate and love you dearly o matter your look. However, if you meet your desired partner, maintain your shape and size to suit the type of person your partner saw the first time. You must use your commonsense here to save your relationship from a break up. If you were skinny when you met your partner, maintain your shape. Maybe that was the singular reason your partner was attracted to you in the first place.

    LOOK FOR A COMPATIBLE PARTNER
    Apply wisdom while in relationships with the opposite sex. You should be wise in choice making thoroughly observing to know if you are compatible with the man or woman you are in relationship with. Most married people today are sad and regret the choice of spouse they made because they just jumped into the marriage without knowing their partners well enough.

    DO NOT REVEAL EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU
    Another important commonsense way to save your relationship from a break up is this. Read this and understand it well. Be wise not to reveal all information about you in one day immediately you start a relationship with a potential life partner. It is wrong presentation of you in relationship. Personal information about each other should be known gradually as the relationship grows. Do not reveal to the new person you are dating fundamental family secrets, like curses, hereditary problems or a sickness until the relationship has fully grown.

    STUDY YOUR PARTNER'S CHARACTER
    In other to save your relationship from a break up, you must fully study your partner before being carried away or infatuated and announcing to the whole world that your partner is the best person for you. You should not introduce somebody you just met to friends and family members as your future wife or husband until you have fully studied his or her character to know the person actually wants to marry you or ready to be committed to a long term relationship.

    AVOID RUMORS AND GOSSIPS IN RELATIONSHIPS
    When you hear negative reports about the person you are dating, investigate and be sure before taking any actions. Some serious relationships have experienced sudden break ups because one of the partners was told the boyfriend is always seen with a girl without finding out about the girl is. Rumors and gossips are capable of causing relationship break ups. Do not be surprise to see a once loving partner suddenly behaving strangely because of a false negative report picked up from others.

    AVOID ARGUMENTS
    Another commonsense way to save your relationship from a break up is to avoid arguments. Be smart and avoid arguments with your partner. To the ladies reading this, know today that men do not like argumentative women. Desist from this habit. Shouting or arguing constantly with a man can break up the relationship you have built over the years. Do not use abusive words.

    GIFTS
    Do not receive gifts from a man or woman you do not love or intend to marry. "Nothing goes for nothing". If you keep receiving gifts from the person you do not love, you will pay the price on day. Do not place high monetary value on the gift from your partner. Show appreciation and love. Your partner can use gifts to know the type of person you are. The manner you give and receive gifts can be use to determine your character. This is another commonsense way to save your relationship from a break up. Most people do not know this.

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

    Why Men Say One Thing and Do Another

    Have you ever had the experience of seeing a man drift away from you because "he wasn't ready for a relationship," only to find soon after that he's out dating other women?

    The things men say vary - he can say that he's not ready to be in a relationship, or he can say that he needs to be alone. Whatever the case, it seems that many men don't really mean what they way - and it infuriates many, many great women all over the dating game.

    Probably more than infuriating, it's baffling. Why do men say one thing and do another? Are they worthless jerks who can't commit? Or maybe they really don't know what they want?

    Actually, a man and a woman can say the exact same things but mean differently. For instance, when you say, "I'd like to stay home and relax," then you're probably thinking of doing your nails, checking out your to-do list, and maybe watch TV. But when a man says "I'd like to stay home and relax," he'll probably watch sports, drink beer, play video games, and order pizza for delivery.

    So what exactly do men mean when they say, "I'm not ready for a relationship?"

    They actually mean something along the lines of "I'm looking to be in a relationship with a woman who's everything I want her to be - independent, easygoing, fun, and level-headed. You can be this woman, but you don't have these qualities yet - and I'm not really interested in having to teach you all that."

    Yep - they simply don't think that you're the one for them.

    So why don't they just tell you?

    Simple - they're looking for a woman who already has those qualities. They don't like having to teach you every little thing about how to be the woman of their dreams.

    Let's face it. If you were looking for a bodyguard, would you hire someone who told you, "Sure, I can be a bodyguard. But can you give me a little time to learn the basics?" Of course not - you'd much rather hire a bodyguard who already knew what to do.

    Same goes with men. The better ones out there are looking for a woman who could make their life a lot more fun and enjoyable, without having to teach them anything. They're out there looking for a "cool" girl.

    And you can be a "cool" girl if you know exactly what men want - and it's not just about sex, either.

    A guy will find it a lot easier to love a woman who they can feel a deep emotional attraction to, in addition to the physical attraction. Remember - relationships based on physical attraction don't last long, but relationships founded on strong emotional connections last a lifetime.

    In other words, it's in the chemistry. If you look inside yourself, getting rid of any bad qualities while fostering good ones, then you'll be opening yourself up to relationships with the better men out there.

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

    3 Types of Men Women Can Not Stand - This is Something Every Man Must Know at All Costs

    When it comes to women it all boils down to the way you truly make them feel. You see it's all about doing the right things at the right time but often a lot of men out there don't really realize what they are doing due to which they end up making a lot of mistakes which turns women off. This is the major reason why you must be aware of these before it's too late. Read on to discover what these mistakes are and what can be done in order to prevent them from happening...........

    Not being a good listener- This is one thing women complain about all the time. A lot of men out there feel that they are right all the time and are simply not willing to listen. This is one aspect women simply can not stand as they want to be with someone who understands them rather than someone who argues all the time over small matters.

    Being way too needy and desperate- This is another thing which completely turns females off. You see they want to be around someone who can make them feel good instead of someone who feel bad about himself all the time and is always asking for approval and seeking attention.

    Trying to become someone you really are not- Fake men are the one's women try to avoid at all possible costs. Women would rather be with an honest man who is completely honest about himself then with someone who lies all the time and tries to fake his personality just to be with a girl or just to temporarily impress her. It's always better to be someone you are than someone you simply are not.

    What you don't know yet- Ever tried to wonder what's in a woman's mind? What is she thinking about? Do you know that women do not always mean what they say? They might say something and mean the exact opposite. But what do women actually want? Do you know there are some secrets women don't want men to know but you absolutely must know these secrets in order to succeed with women? Read on to discover 9 most "Shocking Secrets.

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN,




    How to Make a Girl Feel Irresistible Attraction Towards You - You Must Not Miss This at Any Cost

    One thing which is not taught in school is social dynamics and everything one should know about relationships. This is the major reason why a lot of guys out there tend to somewhat struggle with this subject. There are some keys you must know at all possible costs if you truly want to get some results with the opposite sex. Read on to discover what these keys are and achieve earth shattering results......

    Maintain an emotional connection- Women are more emotional but men are more rational and this is the basic difference between the two. If you truly want to make them get attracted towards you, you must be able to make an emotional connection with them if you want them to be attracted towards you.

    It's a combination of all the emotions- At the same time it also means that she should experience a combination of all the emotions to really get attracted towards you. You see she can not be happy all the time around you as that would make it extremely predictable and after a while she would start getting bored of you. This is the major reason why she must go through all the extremes a human can actually experience.

    Make her work for it all the time- At the same time you should never be too easy to get or deal with. You must be something she struggles to keep all the time. You see when she has to work to keep your attention she would try extremely hard and her attraction towards you will grow instead of die with time.

    BY HARRISON OM OTUENMHEN.

    This is Why Women Chase Bad Boys - Here is the Blunt Truth Finally Revealed in Front of Your Eyes

    Well it's often said that nice guys finish last but a lot of females out there would simply disagree with this statement. They always say that they want nice men but why do they always end up chasing the bad ones? You see it might not apply to every girl out there but majority of women do. There are some shocking reasons most guys are not aware of. Read on to discover what these reasons are and get ready to be shocked...

    Bad guys are mostly emotionally stable- Most bad boys out there are some what cold towards emotions and don't give the type of reactions a girl would expect from them. You see this very fact makes a lot of girls think and such men automatically become a rare breed women run after. Unlike nice guys who always show a strong reaction towards a girl's comments and often end up at the receiving end of rejection from girls.

    They are hard to get that's why girls have to have them- Put it this way! If there is a great looking girl who always ends up getting a lot of attention from almost every guy out there suddenly ends up being ignored. You see this would raise her curiosity levels as to why this guy didn't pay attention towards me. Therefore the guy becomes an automatic challenge for her and she would pursue him to see what he's really all about.

    They work on their own terms- Bad boys don't work on someone else's terms. They make their own route instead of following someone else's. You see when it comes to the matter of nice guys they always end up agreeing with the girl on almost everything and they try to please her in every way possible due to which they come across as any other guy.

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

    How Women Control Men - Here is the Shocking Revelation You Simply Can Not Afford to Miss

    Why do you feel men always have to work hard in a relationship? Why is it that some men fall into the friends category extremely fast even when they feel they did everything in the right way shape and form? You see women have a best kept secret weapon using which they control men and most men don't even realize this. This is the major reason why you must not miss this at any cost. Read on to discover how women control men and their true secrets........

    They will show you a bit of attention and you will be lured- A lot of women do this in order to get the guy to spend money on them and the fact is that a lot of men actually fall for this trick. They might make you feel like that they are real interested in you and might even get into a very interesting conversation with you. Eventually you will realize that you have spent a lot of money on them and this might go on for several months if you don't spot it early.

    They make you jealous- This is one very strong psychological trick they use and almost every man falls into this trap. Actually this is the real way most women get men to chase them down like crazy and almost beg for attention. You see they might start by showing you a lot of attention and after a while they might talk to other guys in front of you or even talk about other guys with you.

    They will test you all throughout- You see they will try to know as much as possible about you and the more information you give out the least interested they would be in you. You must always keep the mystery part maintained if you really want some long term results with females.

    An absolute must know for you- This secret is an absolute must know for you no matter what. This is the grand daddy of all which would give you the ultimate power to become a magnet towards which every woman would be attracted. This is only known to a few and you are one of the lucky one's who are being introduced to this shocking secret- Tell me the Secret?

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

    To Be Or Not to Be Honest in a Relationship.

    Too much of anything might not be good for you just like being too honest with your partner might not be. We all have secrets and perhaps some secrets are better left unsaid. If you have a new partner and you feel you want to trust him or her i would tell you to go right a head and trust them. What i will not tell you is to be totally honest. Its possible to trust someone without necessarily telling them everything about yourself. Sometimes being too honest can ruin your relationship. Being too honest might not be a good thing.

    We all want to know exactly what the person we are having a relationship with thinks or do but sometimes what we do not know will not hurt us. There are things that our partners do that if they told us we would never love them again. We might also never look at them the same way we used to look at them before they told us the truth. The respect you had for them also disappears because they did something that you would not have dared to do yourself. That is why sometimes letting what happened in the past be in the past is a good approach to life. You should be satisfied with what you know about them and trust them enough not to hurt you.

    However, sometimes being honest is good. Telling half truths sometimes only worsen the situation. Sometimes being honest saves the partner from finding out something through other sources. Things that you should have told them yourself before they found out from someone else. Relationships have been known to break because a partner could not simply tell the truth or that they hid some truth from their partner. Being honest will also help you be at peace with yourself. You will not worry about your partner finding out something you did from some other people. You will rest knowing what ever you did your partner is okay with it and that they are supporting you and they love you just the way you are.

    Whatever you decide in your relationship and whatever your heart feels comfortable with is what you should do. If you feel being totally honest with your partner will not change the way they see you then you should go ahead and tell them everything and not hide. However, if you feel your partner will judge you and maybe leave you then you can choose to tell them half truth. At the end of it all, there has to be some level of honesty in your relationship. You will be the one to decide how much will hurt your relationship and how much will not. Know the person you are relating with, get to know what they expect of you and what they do not. If the person can not handle the truth, spare them and tell them half truths, if they can bear to be told the whole truth and nothing but the truth, go ahead, knock them out, they will recover.

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

    "9 Most Shocking Secrets Women Don't Want Men to Know...."

    "9 Most Shocking Secrets Women Don't Want Men to Know...."

    Ever tried to wonder what's in a woman’s mind? What is she thinking about? Do you know that women do not always mean what they say. They might say something and mean the exact opposite. But what do women actually want? Read on to discover some of the most shocking secrets women don't want men to know.

    Blonds aren’t always dumb- If you thought all of them were dumb than you are strongly mistaken. Hair colour does not affect a person's IQ. They only act dumb to seem cute or get you to spend money on them and if you do that than you are dumb not them.

    Women get jealous as hell- They might deny it but the fact is they get extremely jealous even if their man talks to a random female or maybe a friend. She might pretend to act all nice but inside her jealousy volcano is about to erupt.

    I am the sexiest of them all- Every woman has this mind frame no matter how much they try to deny it. Almost every woman wants to feel like the one and only beauty queen in the world as if nothing compares and demand royal treatment from all men.

    Am I fat- I know you’ve heard this one time and again but let's all admit to it officially! No matter how skinny she is she would never consider herself thin. Almost every woman occasionally asks this annoying question- "Am I looking fat in this honey?”

    They always lie about shopping- They might be out grocery shopping but always end up getting something for themselves which they thought was cute. They either try to hide it or lie about its price saying it was on sale.

    Don't share secrets with them- If you have than you are already on prime time radio. Almost every woman shares each and every secret with her friends. They tend to share their secrets over a cup of coffee and have a good laugh over it. And yeh when I say secrets it means your private secrets as well ( he he) if you know what I mean.

    What shoes are you wearing- If you thought it was a myth than think again. Women do judge a man by his shoes. So better make it a point to wear nice clean shoes the next time you walk out.

    They know when you are cheating- Women have inbuilt instincts and emotion system which beeps and alerts when their man is cheating. No matter how big of a player you are you would always be caught no matter what.

    An absolute must know for you- This secret is an absolute must know for you no matter what. This is the grand daddy of all which would give you the ultimate power to become a magnet towards which every woman would be attracted. This is only known to a few and you are one of the lucky one's who are being introduced to this shocking secret click here- Tell me the real secret



    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

    This is Why You Will Never Get the Girl of Your Dreams - You Must Know This Before It's Too Late

    So why do you think some guys suck at attracting females? Every guy out there wants to be with the girl of his dreams but why is it that he either has to settle for something else or worse nothing at all? And at the same time there are guys out there who are able to get any girl they desire within minutes. You see the one's how get the girls know what to do and how to do it. They know some things you don't know. Read on to discover what these things are and achieve mind blowing results fast.........

    Not making the first move- Girls will never easily approach you even when you have stunning good looks. You see one of the major reasons why a lot of guys out there don't get the women of their dreams is simply due to the fact that they never bothered to approach the one's they want to be with. They just keep waiting for the right moment and guess what? That right moment never comes. Therefore you must learn to approach otherwise someone else might take what you want.

    Bring too concerned about whether she will like you or not- When you have a high sense of concern regarding whether she will like you or not you will always end up losing her. You see the guys who always get the girls have the attitude of non-attachment where they don't get affected by what a girl thinks about them. And the fact is that this is the attitude which gets most girls attracted towards men.

    Giving her all the attention- This is more or less like trying to convince her to like you. You must make the girl earn your attention instead of giving her attention all the time. Always remember that unless she has to work hard to get you she will never feel any sense of real attraction towards you.


    What you don't know yet- Ever tried to wonder what's in a woman's mind? What is she thinking about? Do you know that women do not always mean what they say? They might say something and mean the exact opposite. But what do women actually want? Do you know there are some secrets women don't want men to know but you absolutely must know these secrets in order to succeed with women? Read on to discover 9 most "Shocking Secrets" women don't want men to know. This is something you can't afford to miss at any cost click here- Tell Me The Secrets

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

    Finding True and Lasting Love.

    There are so many people feeling lonely and looking for love, desperate for a partner, and understandably so! It is a built-in mechanism in our minds, our bodies, as well as our souls and unfortunately our media can cash in on this fact. There are so many markets based on this weakness that so many of us can succumb to, and so many advertising schemes based on exploiting it for profit.

    People are often lured in by promises that they will be more attractive using some products than others and there are countless dating programs online and off promising to make it easier to find the love of your life, your soul mate, your beau ideal. They certainly can be helpful resources, but more often than not people can become disappointed in them or even become hopeless when such programs don't deliver the results that they claim. I don't think that this situation in general can be remedied, because I don't feel it's the plan that fails. Any one of those dating sites, books and programs can work if only you begin them with the right mindset and reasonable expectations.

    However, I think you must understand, you are the most important person that will ever care about you. How you feel about and treat yourself has so much more impact than the feelings of those around you. The better you feel about yourself and the more you love and value yourself, the less effect anyone else can have on your personal outlook or your own self-image. The more you value and care for yourself, the less you will need to seek the affection of others.

    Of course, you will still want to experience true love and a healthy, long-lasting relationship, you will continue to look for it and be open to it. But when we are more desperate to find someone else who will love us, the more likely we may be to accept affection from others without truly understanding what their motives are. When we rely on receiving affection from others to feel better about ourselves, to feel validated, to feel attractive and self-confident, we will accept attention from less than savory admirers.

    So many of us get into relationships with the wrong people, simply because they made us feel good about ourselves in the beginning, only to become disillusioned later in the relationship and learn that the source of that attention that made us feel so good is not who we believed they were, they had other motives, they are unfaithful, they are abusive. We get hurt mentally, emotionally and at times even physically because we wanted so badly to feel beautiful.

    It doesn't necessarily have to happen this way. We are women. beautiful, remarkable creatures whose bodies do incredible things that we can hardly begin to understand. We have the amazing gift of bearing children, nourishing them within our wombs as our bodies almost magically help them to grow, our bodies can even create the sustenance that will continue to nourish them for months or years after birth if we so choose!

    We each have wonderful, unique qualities that we should cherish and the person that we choose to shower with the radiant glow of our affection ought to value all of those fantastic qualities as well! But can you really expect them to see those amazing qualities within if you, the one who knows you best, fails to recognize them?

    I have recommended this book "Emotional Blackmail" by Susan Forward to so many people who have come from a relationship full of manipulation and I truly believe that everyone who intends to venture into a relationship with another person should obtain and read this book. To me it is like the bible of relationships, I wish I had it before some of my previous relationships and I am not saying that I was always the angel, I was just able to see and realize the faults of both sides after reading it. Enjoy!

    Heather has been lucky enough to find a life partner who is a Behavioural Therapist and because of this has been able to develop and grow as a caring human being. It is so true, we don't know what we don't know and when we realise, it can be very embarrassing to realise you were probably not the ideal partner in previous relationships. The book I recommend is a must read for everyone who wants to see the error in their own ways as well as that of those around them.


    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

    Relationships - Is it Love Or Loneliness?

    The concept as well as the feeling of being in Love has become so distorted and confused these days that few can really tell you, when asked, whether they are truly in love with their partner. Why is that?

    Well one of the most significant reasons is that true feelings of Love are often clouded by other powerful feelings, one of which are the deep feelings of loneliness that many also experience in tandem.

    Often the murkiness is so great that the relief one gets from having their feelings of loneliness quenched on meeting a new partner are often confused/mistaken for true feelings of love. The need to have such lonely feelings kept at bay then become the basis and foundation upon which the relationship gets built. Do you see the problem with this picture?

    If not let me elaborate.

    The need to keep a relationship going based on the need to avoid ever feeling alone is based on feelings of fear. That fear being the fear of being alone. In the presence of fear true feelings of love actually get submerged and stifled. In other words they never get the chance to surface.

    A relationship based on such feelings inevitably lead the "lonely" partner to begin exhibiting behaviors which are controlling towards their partner whenever their sense of security is threatened. Such behaviors will attempt to limit the healthy self expression of the partner solely for the purpose of keeping the lonely partner from feeling anxious or insecure.

    So now I ask you, is that what you would call "loving behavior"?

    I highly doubt it!

    If you're with me then, if you wish, do the following:

    Place one hand over your heart and simply assert to yourself, as if speaking from your heart, that a) this is not true loving behavior and b) you personally never desire to make feelings of loneliness the foundation of your relationship.

    Next, if you would like to have more clarity on what the experience and feeling of Love really is, again with your hand over your heart, assert this to yourself as well.

    Now notice how you feel inside. If you've followed me so far you may be feeling a greater sense of clarity, joy, lightness, inner peace, contentment, and yes feelings of love.

    Finally, allow yourself to be inspired by your new state to begin imagining what you want your relationship to be and feel like. As you create this new picture, imagine that it is actually happening in your life right now. Then notice how you feel.

    If this feels desirable to you, again you may wish to assert this to yourself via your heart and then again notice how you feel.

    So in your contemplation of that question above you have been helped to awaken to greater clarity of what love is by asking you to look at what it isn't. This is your first step to putting your life and relationship on a strong foundation of Love and is based on a powerful process called the Mind Resonance Process® (MRP).

    If you would like to build on your experience kindly contact me at the email address below.

    Nick Arrizza MD is an International Life, Executive, Organizational and Spiritual Tele-Coach, Keynote Speaker, Trainer and Facilitator who lives in Toronto, Canada. He is the CEO and Founder of Arrizza Performance Coaching Inc. and the developer of the powerful Mind Resonance Process® (MRP).

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

    13 Long Distance Relationship Ideas - Things to Do Together When You Can't Be

    People in long distance relationships can have a hard time staying connected, because couples are limited in what they can do together. Many are limited to the phone, email, instant messaging, and texting. My boyfriend, Frank, and I have come up with a list of things we like to do with each other along with some other ideas. Hopefully you'll see a couple things you haven't thought of yet :)

    1. Watch things simultaneously together! Watch the same movie or TV show at the same time. Find something online to watch, or watch something on your own TV. We especially loved watching the show Dexter together. We would make a date night and watch a show online and have our webcams going at the same time. It's not the same as cuddling up on the couch, but it's as close as we could get! This is a good idea if you find yourself running out of things to talk about on the phone... doing this takes off the pressure of talking since you'll both be into the show/movie, plus it gives you something to talk about afterward!

    2. Send your boyfriend/girlfriend flowers! There are lots of websites that will deliver flowers for you, but if you don't want to spend money sending a real bouquet, you can send a virtual bouquet using Flowers2Mail.com. I just got done sending Frank some roses myself :)

    3. Play a game together. Here are a couple places where you can find multiplayer games: Yahoo! and Pogo.com

    4. Get a webcam. If you don't already have one, get one! Frank and I use Sightspeed. It's a great way to stay connected. Skype offers similar services.

    5. Send an e-card! I know you've probably seen this suggestion before. Tired of lame e-cards? You'll get a kick out of SomeEcards.com (Thinking of You section) These e-cards are hilarious! If you're easily offended by vulgar language, this site isn't for you.

    6. HoochyMail! Okay, so maybe Frank doesn't like this one so much... HoochyMail.com is a website where you enter information and it automatically generates a story with your names in a MadLib type fashion. You choose the story level: sexy, x-rated, or off the wall. I did this for Frank, and cried laughing reading the story the website generated. I think Frank just stared at his computer with his eyebrows bunched up.

    7. Say cheese! Before Frank and I had webcams, I would occasionally take a picture and email it to him so he could see me. He always loved it :) If he was having a bad day they would cheer him up. I wish I had this or that Frank had this... I found this website: Estarling.com. They sell WiFi photo frames that you can email pictures to. You control the frame from miles away! You can make playlist and set the time and day you want them to play. How neat is that?
    Another picture idea? Create online photo albums for each other. A great site is Webshots.com

    8. Share a journal. I wanted to do this with Frank, but he's lazy. I had this brilliant idea for us to share a journal. I would keep it for a couple weeks or so, and write in it everyday with my thoughts, and then mail it to Frank, and he could keep the journal and write in it, and it would just keep going back and forth. I thought it was a good idea. Maybe your boyfriends/girlfriends will be more willing participants than Frank! Other journal ideas? You could also each have your own journals that you can exchange. Or create an online journal at online journal websites such as Xanga.com and LiveJournal.com These both have privacy controls so you can control who sees your journal.

    9. Write a letter. You've probably seen this one before, but it is really a good idea. Handwritten letters are really nice to get and can be fun to write. I love seeing Frank's messy handwriting, haha, so much character. And handwritten letters can mean a lot to someone... Over a year ago, Frank and I were having steady arguments, I can't remember what they were about, but we couldn't seem to settle things on the phone, and it would be a while before we could see each other... months. I tried writing him emails to express my feelings... but I finally was able to get through to him in a handwritten letter. After reading it he immediately called, and after being "Mr. Insensitive" that whole time, he finally warmed up and apologized for what it was that caused such a problem between the both of us (ahhh yes, I remember what it was now!). The letter meant a lot more to him than an email.

    10. Learn new things about each other. Think you have run out of everything you could say to each other? Try this.... When it's one of those days where you guys just can't think of anything to talk about, try asking questions. Here's a good site with 100 questions to ask your love: 100 Questions to Know Your Partner

    11. Make a website! Make a website about your relationship that you both can work on. It is a great way to track your progress in your relationship, and what a great idea it would be to add a timeline.... I might just do that. Freewebs.com offers free websites with blogging, photo album, and video functions. Be creative together!

    12. Sing karaoke together! This is a neat idea I've come across. Haha, I'm not sure Frank would do this with me... But for you die hard karaoke singers out there, this might be some fun, and something you can do online with your love! You will need a webcam and mic for this one. There are many websites out there that offer this type of activity. Search for "Free Online Karaoke."

    13. Read a book together. A great idea is to read a book together. This is great for those couples who have limited time together, and need to find something to do together when they can't be. Find a book you think you both would enjoy and and agree to read a chapter every night. Reading together, can open up lots of discussion, and can help boost a relationship in which both people feel they have run out of things to talk about.

    by HARRISON OMOTUEHNMHEN

    ROMANCE

    Love is a wonderful feeling that once in a while we all get to experience. Even the worst people among us are loved and we can not say that there are people who do not deserve to be loved because we all deserve to be. There are so many way of knowing that a man is in love with you. A human behavior is can be very predictable sometimes and if you open your eyes and ears you will be able to know if a person is in love with you or not. Then it will be up to you to decide if you want to have a relationship with him or not.

    A man who is in love with you will always steal glances at you. He will look at you when he suspects you are not looking at him. This could be because he wants to talk to you but at that moment he cannot. This could be because you are busy or in a meeting. He could also be scared of talking to you and he is contemplating how he is going to start talking to you. However do not confuse all looks to be that someone is interested in you. It has to be a specific kind of look. With stolen glances you might catch him severally looking at you and whenever you try to make eye contacts with him he will avoid it. This is because he will get embarrassed that you caught him looking at you.

    If you want to know someone is in love with you, look at your phone. The person who has called you the most will most likely be the person who is in love with you. Its an easy way of knowing if a person is in love with you. Every opportune moment they have they will make sure they call. They will give so many reasons as to why they called except love. If you are keen, you will also notice that whenever he calls he does not have a strong reason for doing so. You might just want to put the man out of his misery by telling him you love him too. However you also have to be careful when coming up with this conclusion. This is because the person could be only liking your company and not necessarily in love with you.

    A person who is in love with you will want to touch you all the time. Most of the time they do it innocently. When you are talking he will touch you either to remove something that is not even there in the first place. He will also laugh at all the jokes you make even though they are not funny at all. He could be the only person who finds you interesting when every other person thinks otherwise. He will also want to spend more time with you and he will think you are great. He might also not see the fault in you though you have several. If you recognize all this signs in your man friend then you should be knowing by now that the man is in love with you.

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN

    Tuesday, September 2, 2008

    Do Looks Matter to Women? Alright Now You Need to Pay Very Close Attention Here

    Most men are just completely confused when it comes to the matter of whether looks really matter to women or not. A lot of guys out there feel that looks do matter all the time and the very first thing a woman considers is what a guy looks like. You see this is a big misconception and the fact is that ever ugly guys can get hot women. Read on to discover some of the most shocking revelations on this subject.......

    Your body language matters more- The way you act and behave around her within the very first 5 minutes has a lot to do with whether she is going to like you or not. You see a lot of men out there feel that women only considers there looks within the very first few minutes but the fact is that it's not the way you look but the way you act which makes the big difference.

    How comfortable you are with the way you are- This is another factor women consider during the very first few minutes you spend with them. You see women are more socially smart in comparison to men and they always notice your level of self confidence and esteem based on the way you really are. If you are not comfortable in your own skin it will reflect on your personality and the girl will read that within seconds.

    How interesting are you? - You can have stunning looks but if you don't have an interesting personality there is no way that a girl will ever like you. She will feel no attraction towards you unless you have a strong personality and an interesting character. Therefore you must work on building a strong character and a highly interesting personality as that would instantly please her.

    What you don't know yet- Ever tried to wonder what's in a woman's mind? What is she thinking about? Do you know that women do not always mean what they say? They might say something and mean the exact opposite. But what do women actually want? Do you know there are some secrets women don't want men to know but you absolutely must know these secrets in order to succeed with women? Read on to discover 9 most "Shocking Secrets" women don't want men to know. This is something you can't afford to miss at any cost.

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.



    Do Looks Matter to Women? Alright Now You Need to Pay Very Close Attention Here

    Most men are just completely confused when it comes to the matter of whether looks really matter to women or not. A lot of guys out there feel that looks do matter all the time and the very first thing a woman considers is what a guy looks like. You see this is a big misconception and the fact is that ever ugly guys can get hot women. Read on to discover some of the most shocking revelations on this subject.......

    Your body language matters more- The way you act and behave around her within the very first 5 minutes has a lot to do with whether she is going to like you or not. You see a lot of men out there feel that women only considers there looks within the very first few minutes but the fact is that it's not the way you look but the way you act which makes the big difference.

    How comfortable you are with the way you are- This is another factor women consider during the very first few minutes you spend with them. You see women are more socially smart in comparison to men and they always notice your level of self confidence and esteem based on the way you really are. If you are not comfortable in your own skin it will reflect on your personality and the girl will read that within seconds.

    How interesting are you? - You can have stunning looks but if you don't have an interesting personality there is no way that a girl will ever like you. She will feel no attraction towards you unless you have a strong personality and an interesting character. Therefore you must work on building a strong character and a highly interesting personality as that would instantly please her.

    What you don't know yet- Ever tried to wonder what's in a woman's mind? What is she thinking about? Do you know that women do not always mean what they say? They might say something and mean the exact opposite. But what do women actually want? Do you know there are some secrets women don't want men to know but you absolutely must know these secrets in order to succeed with women? Read on to discover 9 most "Shocking Secrets" women don't want men to know. This is something you can't afford to miss at any cost.

    BY HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

    HOW TO MAKE HIM LOVE YOU FOREVER.

    How to make him love you forever, is something almost every woman has wondered about at some point in her life. When we meet a great guy and we start falling head over heels for him, we can't help but wonder, if the back of our minds, when it might go wrong. Relationships aren't all about sunshine and smiles, they have rocky times too. Unfortunately, many men bolt when the newness of the relationship starts to wear off. So what can you do to keep him not only interested but addicted to you?

    When you are thinking about how to make him love you forever, consider that people change over the course of time. He'll change and you'll need to change too. A relationship can go stagnant if one partner doesn't move forward. Embracing new experiences is really important and you need to show the man in your life that you're willing to do this. Whether it be making a move together to a new city or pursuing a degree, you have to show him that you are looking towards the future and you're not just stuck in one spot in the past.

    Accepting him and all his flaws is crucial too. A person's bad habits can start to wear on us over time and that's usually when nagging enters a relationship. He's never going to be perfect, so accept all the imperfections. If you want to know how to make him love you forever consider the fact that men adore women who are easy to get along with. Don't nag him about the small things he does that irritate you, instead compliment him on everything he does right. If you can make him feel good about himself, he'll feel even better about loving you.

    Jealousy has no place in a long term relationship. One of the most common complaints among men about the women in their lives is jealousy. Men like women who are confident. If you're continually getting angry when he talks to other women or spends time with female friends, you're showing him that not only are you distrustful, but you're not confident in yourself. If you don't bat an eyelash when he talks about another woman, he'll feel even closer to you. Men love women who are confident in what they have to offer. Show him that you're not threatened by his friendships with other women and he'll find you irresistible.

    by HARRISON OMOTUENMHEN.

    5 SIGN,S SHE,S NOT INTERESTED IN YOU.

    5. She avoids intimate settings

    Where she chooses to meet you says a lot. There’s a huge difference between a quiet dinner for two and coffee at lunch. If you ask her out for a romantic dinner and she suggests a lunch date, it might mean that she doesn’t want you to get the impression that your friendship is leading anywhere, particularly the bedroom. Take this avoidance for what it’s worth: it's one of her signs she’s not interested.

    4. She hasn’t come near you

    Whether it’s by conscious decision or not, if she hasn’t made any sort of physical contact with you, such as a brush on the arm or a pat on the thigh, she may have already counted you out of the race. It’s said that women generally know within a few minutes of meeting a man whether they’ll go to bed with him, and if there’s no incidental contact within the first couple of meetings, the chemistry’s probably not there and she knows it.

    3. She doesn't engage in body language

    The body language of a woman who is attracted to you is a telltale sign of interest. Does she play with her hair, mirror your gestures, sit up straight and generally try to look her best around you? No? Then she’s sending out signs she’s not interested.

    2. She plays up other girls

    This clue is as blatant as they come, yet men fail to read into this correctly. Unlike men, girls are constantly trying to set up their single friends, especially if they think you’d be a good match. When the girl you think you’re seeing starts to big up a single friend and asks you what you think about her, she’s more than likely trying to shake you off.

    1. She doesn’t return your calls

    Please, for your sake, take this as one of the major signs she’s not interested and not as an amusing game of cat and mouse. Don’t assume that she lost your number, that she tried to call but the line was busy or any other delusional rubbish like that. There’s nothing sadder than a guy who refuses to take a hint; don’t be him. Sure, you’re thinking: Some girls like persistent men. True, but they won’t really respect these men in the end. Don’t get played like this.


    So, if you are in a relationship wher the object of your desire is showing any of these signs, maybe its time you move on bro,

    Remember, there are a billion other girls waiting,